Saturday, December 9, 2006

shes got habits.

she has a bad habit of writing passwords down in the backs of books [she owns].
im not very sure how it happen that way. i just needed to write something down one day and well there was a book so it began. its probably not such a good habit to have. what if i lend the book out? or what if i get rid of it? then some random person knows my business. hmm, im going to have to reconsider this one.
but it probably wont change anything. because we [i] do so many things that we [i] think we [i] need to change but then dont. i guess some could argue that means our hearts arent really in it in the first place. id hate to see a list of things that i set out to do then let the idea go in the wind.
hey thats fun:
thinking of something blowing away in the wind i had a side moment of a daydream...
it would be fun to sit perhaps near water, perhaps on a dock because i found thats the most fun environment for bubbles if it doesnt conjer up old memories, and blow bubbles. but with a twist this time. to everytime you blow a bubble: name a worry that is being carried away with it.
i think im on to something here.
i think i decided this blog is supposed to be a secret. maybe because i swore to myself that i would never write one. because i thought it too naked to display my thoughts for others to read, you know, that opens an enormous door to judgement. why would someone welcome that? so i guess the next baby step is having one but not telling anyone you know? thats pretty safe right? i suppose the next action is taking this little project off the private selection then.
its funny how you can think of random things all day long then when the time comes to get anything into proof it suddenly hides behind a huge rock. thats what my thoughts/dreams/aspirations seem to do to me. and im not good at keeping a notpad withe me to write my thoughts down. that takes too much effort. so instead i just write random crap down and get dissapointed with what i come up with later. maybe thats why all my paper journals never worked out, because i would reread them and realize how dumb they sounded. hmm.
-im really into the format right now:
starting now I’m starting over
I’m gonna sleep with the next person I meet
starting now I’m starting over
you swore "together forever"
now you're telling lies
well tell me your words
they got no,
they got no concept of time tick tock,
you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time bomb, baby, ohtick tock,
you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time oh, oh, ohoh no,
was it worth it
was it worth what you did to your wrists?
was it worth what you did to big business?
was it worth what your friends put up their noses?
So, starting now I'm starting over (stop it)
Tell the new wave kids their make-up kits
Can find me where self pity gets a breath of fresh air tick tock,
you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time bomb, baby,
ohtick tock, you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time oh, oh,
ohyou set the watch,
you're just in timeoh,
to wreck my life,
to bring back what I left behind
tick tock, you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time bomb, baby,
a time bomb, baby,
a time bomb, baby,
a time oh, oh, oh
four years and you fell for a waiter
I’m sure he says he’s an actor so you’re acting like....
(you never tried to take your life)
so, starting now I’m starting over
I’m throwing bottles and
I’m taking showers
I’m going to sleep
I’m going to sleep so,
starting now I’m starting over (stop it) well,
starting now I’m starting over (stop it)
to play the game,
get even,
act my age tick tock,
you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time bomb, baby, oh
tick tock, you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time oh, oh, oh you set the watch,
you’re just in time to wreck my life,
to bring back what i left behind tick tock,
you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time bomb, baby, oh
tick tock, you’re not a clock,
you’re a time bomb baby,
a time oh, oh, oh Oh no,
was it worth itwas it worth what you did to your wrists?

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