closets are for clutter, right?

i have got to get a handle on this closet situation.
you know its bad when you "organize" your closet 3 times a week.
excuse me, you know its bad when you know it needs it that many times a week.
its getting serious. seriously.

ah, well at least my car is consistently clean.
maybe i should put a radio in my closet and pretend it will transport me places.
ohh, just maybe.

bikes, sandwiches, wednesdays, and peru?

my dear readers this post shall again include/be related to food.
i promise that its not on my mind ALL the time. only three +
times a day. you can interpret the (+) however you want. but in my defense i write mostly involving food topics because other than my daydreamings of food making, my life is fairly hum drum.

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well except for yesterday ...i was riding my bike to class and well, i passed this little old man in a fluorescent orange sweatshirt, riding a bike as well. only to start going up this small but long incline.. and realized that this trip was quite different since i had a laptop in my bag and thus SO much heavier... and realize my knees were so weak i was barely moving. yeah, probably needless to say that the old man not only caught up to but nearly passed me. im sure laughing at my expense all the same. ah, but i made it. my shoulders hate me now, and im not trying that again, i shall be a frequenter of the computer labs from now on out. with headset in hand. so i dont have to listen to the guy behind me watching a baseball game while im trying to write my paper.

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anyhow so food. i am not quite as talented as gillian and her making bagels from scratch hobby. (although you are going to have to teach me lady, dont forget it) but i do like to dabble in this and that. and for hopefully the rest of the semester i will have the privilege of having a lunch date on wednesdays with my new found friend Melody. im pretty darn excited about this established lunch time, especially since we go to chapel beforehand together, so all the more motive for me to get my chapel credits in. its a win win situation really. and melody is flippin awesome, so you see its quite fun. i suggest you go on and find a wednesday lunch friend for yourself as well. although it doesnt necessariloy have to be a wednesday, but i suggest you share a meal together. and i suggest that one of you or both of you make it. because that makes it all the more fun. this is what said awesome melody and i are doing. and tomorrow its my turn to bring the goods. and i gotta keep up with her utterly cool idea of bringing frozen grapes.



and now i have saved my favorite news for last. today, in my snazzy gmail inbox i received an email official invitation to join SALI with Peru Mission in Trujillo. i wish i knew how to express to you how excited and also how thankful i am for this. i will let you imagine what a party in my brain looks like for yourself, and spare just giving you the details.
so i shall spend one more night of prayer and consideration which will probably be more of a thanking and praising God session because i had been waiting for a clue to drop. i know this is going to sound a little like i am making this up, but i promise im not. but just last night i had a conversation with my wonderful rommate rachel about peru and life in general. i was starting to have a little bit of anxiety because i felt that God was pointing me in the direction of Peru, i just hadnt heard any concrete affirmation and so i was starting to get a little anxious. and i really realized, and told rach, i have no idea what i would do if i couldnt go to peru. it really has a hold of me that much. and rachel helped me to see that this fact in itself even is evidence of God leaving. i can't believe that He would give me a passion and desire to serve him there and then keep me in anderson wondering what the next step is for another year. i think that during the time i was waiting i was really forced to see that, and not just take the privilege of going for granted. so, family, friends, there is still alot to do between now and then, and i would really appreciate your prayers for wisdom and guidance for the process because i admit, it scares me, a bit. and i also pray that you would look at your own life, and the current situation God has you in, be it one you have worked toward or one you dont understand why you have to endure, and just take a minute to ask God to help you live it authentically, and in accordance with his will, even if you dont understand it, because he does.

a little banana a little pumpkin

today i realized something. when my planner fills up with tests and projects and deadlines. my eyes start to become sleep deprived. my entire being anxious from the constancy of waking up to remember that i forgot something that i will later wish i had spent more time on, and family starts expressing future doom if i don't pick up the phone in their direction, there is one thing that comes back to the surface.

i bake.
well, first i visit grocery stores, its like its my favorite past time or something. like when you are first getting to know someone and you are passing back and forth activities of enjoyment to see if you are compatible and thus should continue into friendship "this kind of music and these kind of movies" usually i throw badminton out there waiting to see what kind of response i will get so as to que me on how to approach the rest of the conversation. its usually a safe test line. either they are shocked and pretend they share in your excitement, or they are shocked and ridicule you for it. but as i think about it more and more... browsing grocery store isles and the fulfillment of baking or cooking with specially picked over items later, is really becoming an obsession.

side story: my mom can really attest to my love for this activity. as when i take visits home... i think she likes to mention kroger just to watch me get excited. i love to go in kroger. usually they are ridiculously over-priced. but i love it. especially when you live back in the woods in the wild and wonderful state. they usually knows whats up about fun food items. mom doesnt like to take me to the store when shes just gotten off from a day at work and wants to duck in and out just to grab a couple things. because she knows that grabbing a couple of things turns into and hours worth of browsing for me. im pretty sure the soft spot in my heart for this subject can be no less serious than a teenagers love of mall perusing, or of the elderly's fascination with birds.


i love love to cook. one of the greatest things about not living in a dorm is that i get to have a kitchen. i love to try out recipes. usually when i find something that i really like i will eat it for a month. i did that last year with this thai tofu veggie noodle stuff. im pretty sure my room mates got tired of my pores reeking of garlic. (although if they would have gotten close enough they would have been pleasantly surprised by a hint of lime) this year its more of a theme of black beans / chick peas / feta / cilantro. i frickin love cilantro. and sandwiches. hummus concoctions. i tried avocado grilled cheese recently. brie and bleu grilled cheese.

it makes me super happy to be able to make this food and share it with others too. over the summer we would have friends over after church on sundays for lunch. that was so much fun. i think my favorite day was the time we grilled pizzas. barefoot contessa style. and, ironically enough, the dough i got up even earlier to make totally crashed and and friend and i dashed to the store to get already made dough. where we stumbled upon the amazing idea of making our pizzas on flour tortillas!! that was a really great time.

i know that God gave me this passion for a reason. and i know i cant see my future (and my ideas about my future change daily) but i would nearly be willing to say it will definitely have something somehow to do with cooking. it (usually) makes other people happy. calms me down. and makes me content. i just pray that i dont turn it into a selfish habit.

so tonight i have spent sitting on our couch, crocheting (another serious favorite activity) on some leg warmers while waiting on some bread to finish baking.

a bit of this, and a bit of jack

Jack Johnson's new album is simply, beautiful.
I am convinced that his music is timeless. Its never going to get old, and I am never going to hate it. And the more stuff he puts out, the more I fall in love.




this is the year of the chick pea.

or at least i can speak for myself. i am just nearly convinced that the chick pea, or garbanzo bean if you will, can be added to any homemade dish. especially those intended for consumption in the evening hours. random vegetable concoctions, in pasta salads, in soups, in veggie friendly chilies, on sandwiches via hummus. its quickly climbing the ladder of my favorite food item.
i made this AMAZING (amazing!!) vegetable chili not too long ago that involved butternut squash, which in case you didnt know, is an adventure in and of itself, even to cut; red peppers and various other things including chick peas. it was beautimous. i would post the recipe but i would probably get sued for copyrighting. although i could sight the source.. we'll see in the future.

today i did not have two of my classes, so since i spent the better part of yesterday in the library, i decided to spend the better part of my morning in the kitchen. ive been seeing lots of tasty things that i want to try on this site : http://www.101cookbooks.com/ and i tried some chocolate chip cookies, but they didnt turn out so hot. of course im not going to let that stop me so be sure you will hear more about that venture in the future to come. this morning, i tackled hummus. i was a little scared, and we dont really have a food processor which is nearly more key than the ingredients in making it. but we do have this hand held food processor type deal which of course i tried. it was interesting. i made more of a mess than anything at first (but then, when dont i) but eventually got the hang of it and now i have homemade hummus for some of the many sandwiches i seem to be on a kick in making lately.

it's also come to my attention how random my music interests are lately. last week i bought my first "rap" album, although i dont know that i would really label this guy as a rapper. it sounds very reggae, i mean he is from jamaica (i think). anyway i bought it at best buy. i felt like a horrible impersonator in the check out line. i mean seriously, i though i hope either no one sees me buying this or if they do they strike up conversation with me so they see the humor in how obvious it is that this is my first album as such. well, no said conversation was held. but this time i didnt object to them bagging my one item.

she needs to get a grip on the imagination of her unconcious.

this morning i found hidden in the library the perfect place for one or more of the following activities: (but not limited to my list of course)
*practice in your aspiration to become a monk
*a quaint or erratic jam session with your air guitar
*an intense study on the air speed velocity of swallows
*hiding away for fear of excommunication
*practicing your own politically incorrect puppet show

or anything else your imagination could conjure up. im sure you could think of something fun?
well, anway i found this little paradise of a room that i cant imagine everyone knows about because i didnt know about it.. (although a few of those activities might not be location appropriate as i just heard someone talking on their phone, through the walls, from where, i have no idea, because there is no one here (i looked) so i dont know where its coming from, so if i can h ear them they can probably hear me if im loud enough right?)
right past the childrens section (who knew we had a fairly wide range of childrens books!)
and next to what i think is a second elevator. who knew? well i didnt.
currently it is serving as my space to explore the new jack johnson album in peace. and do a little reading. between classes.


so i have a friend that told me he had a dream about me, then almost refused to tell me what it was. after nearing the point of aggravation he reluctantly told me it was that i hung myself.
i am definitely not a qualified dream interpreter, nor have i read freuds book. but i assure all five of you that might glance on this site, that i am not about to hang myself. seriously, there are too many more types of sushi out there for me to taste first.
its also been a weird season for me in the category of dreams. although the majority of them have been escaping me after i wake up i do remember one, quite well. and im pretty sure it tops the list of dreams i have ever had that have freaked me out.
it goes as such: (disclaimer: do not continue reading if you have a fear of pirates or high chairs)

im working. as a server, in the same location where i work now. but its not the same restaurant and none of the same people are there. and its been turned into a dungeon thats well, been claimed by pirates. a dungeon of a cave really. dirt walls and floor but the occasional part that looks like what i would imagine the bottom of an ooold perhaps pirate ship to look like. complete with large mugs of ale, dim yellow lights, and swollen wood tables. i got the impression that i wasnt necessarily being held there against my will, but perhaps by black mail because i knew it was in my best interst to stay. when all of a sudden i notice my mother, and two older people from my childhood, one a sunday school teacher. at a table in someone elses section. i am immediately hurt that for one they came all the way there and then didnt sit with me but also immensely overjoyed to see them. i approach the table for hugs, and notice, that one, the teacher still in her old age, ... is in a high chair.

then i woke up.

yeah. interpret that one. i dare you.