she finds joy in small things.

like laughing at yourself as you and your fellow housemates tear down a hallway to run into a standing mattress. like pre schoolers.

yes, that really did happen today.

so this has got to be short. or at least this is my starting intention. i tend to ramble. [im sure mom is laughing at that thought] and i need to get to bed.

random things that happened today to either cause me to smile excessively with hilarious laughter attached, or make me want to cover my face and scream. okay, maybe thats a little rash.

1] for the first time ever coffee gave me the jitters. for the record, im not fond of folgerrs columbian brand. sorry bails, i think i like mine a little less bitter. [or dark] ....lol

2] we are nearly halfway through the semester and philosophy hasnt gotten any easier for me. it just continues in a downward spiral. oh the topic is just fine and dandy. i can write about it just fine, apparently because i got one of the higher grades on our first test. but i get anxiety about it starting the night before and when combined with the prementioned coffee, it just doesnt go over so hott. his [by his i mean the professor] love for calling us out randomly to ask us questions just doesnt sit well with my stomach. not well at all. and i can never think of anything to say and im not learning anyting because im worrying hes going to call on me and what am i going to say. seriously, its a hardcore problem.

3] murphys law does come into effect for everyone. its the idea that anything that will go wrong can and will during your last moments after procrastination. as dr reinhart likes to put it... the night before the paper is due when you are writing it, or the few moments before, whatever your style, the printer will cut up, some malfunction will happen with your laptop and the only I. T. guy in the world that can fix it will have just been kidnapped by terrorists. [ i think thats basically how his version goes... dont hold me to it] my version of the story is that any kind of coffee drink you choose to want to buy will for some reason be out of stock or out of reach at the brand new coffee shop and once you do get your choice...after five other preferred choices, you will miss the half and half and grab skim milk instead, regretting not just asking for half and half at the counter for fear of looking dumb because maybe its a new styel to not offer half and half [but who the heck would want to do that?!] so once your paper cup that is burning your hand through the guard is full of skim milk and still barely turning creamy you notice the glorious half and half... ugh. then a few minutes later when you victoriously locate another article for the introduction thats due in a few hours and its by chance in the data base that prints full text pdf articles... alas, it just wont print anything but white paper. *

* i finally got it printed [in html which made it print 37 pages instead of 19 which made me feel like i was burning down a few rainforests] and turned in just fine. no worries.

4] brie and blue cheese grilled sandwiches are yummy for lunch. an extra kick of chick peas inside not recommended for everyone though [i told you they were sneaking into my daily life!!!]

5] the two houses next to us are completely torn down and gone. it only took them two hours to knock down 317. oh but wait... the other smaller house is still sitting on a trailer in our back yard. i guess they are just going to leave it there. it sure does block our view of the bamboo forest in the back. ...

6] we found out that apparently guys [or maybe just a select few] think that our house is too independent. and this is why we are unapproachable and thus why we are all single. apparently we need to be very needy for guys to be attracted to us. ha.

7] i prefer to think its because we have too much fun on our own, like dancing to the beat of a washer and dryer. or watching the curious george sing along video over and over again while singing incredibly off key. or like a more recent adventure [recent as in a few hours ago] such as discovering just how much fun it is to run down a hall and smack/attack/jump into a mattress thats leaned vertically against a wall. only to have the mattress chuck/bounce you back to the floor. all done repeatedly. all caught on video. [video soon to come].

yeah, i think thats a better explanation. the guys with the #6 feelings are just scared.

i think thats all that happen to me today. more or less. oh, but if you decide to start incorporating a lot of water into your system.... it can be toxic. dont drink too much. it can have an effect like alcohol. too much taht is. and you can die from it. [thank you social psychology]

eight glasses a day people. eight glasses a day.


stand close to me dont sail away
baby let them see your heart
let them see just how beautiful you are
...dont you know youre special
youre really something special baby
so you look into you look into the water
and there you are just the way you left yourself
all alone but lift your head and look across the water
cause there youll see all of us together
grab a hand we promise not to let you stand alone.
baby let them see your heart
let them see how beautiful you are
dont you know youre special
youre really soemthing special baby.
[between the trees: you cry a tear to start a river]

she waits thirty years for sushi.

or at least it felt like it.

i was out getting very random things this afternoon [ i should have been writing on a paper but i had just taken a pretty difficult test so i figured i deserved the break] when i decided that i really wanted sushi for dinner. i was out by myself so i decided to stop by fuji [aka the BEST place in anderson to get japanese food... not to mention their sushi is very well priced] i dont think i have ever been in there when they were busy. somehow i managed to avoid the crowds... and ive been there alot. probably at least an average of five-seven times a month. or more. definately more if you involved take out. thats a funny thing about some of the girls i live with and i, last year we didnt know each other and they [at least diana gillian cassie and melissa that i know] would go there all the time as would i. now we go together of course. and diana and i have our fans there... but thats another story. anyway the place was packed!!! on a wednesday night. i dont think it is usually like that. the owner was yelling what i can only assume were obscenities in japanese at the guys more so than usual.
so i ordered miso soup, a salad, and a philly roll. simple enough right? well it took like thirty minutes. which is cool, they were very busy, i just didnt realize it was going to be that long. word to the wise: do not order miso soup. the usual soup you get is just chicken broth [which actually i didnt realize until joanna pointed out to me a while ago] and i wanted soup today so i decided to try the miso. yeah... dont do it. trust me, and i consider myself to have a palate that loves a pretty wide array of stuff. but boiled seaweed just doesnt do it for me. i think i will just do without soup. [ive also tried baby octopus [sushi].... um yeah no thanks. i was peer pressured into it. and, i ate the whole thing... but my stomach is churning just thinking of it, it was really a whole baby octopus!!!!]
but the philly roll was more than worth the wait. that could very well be my favorite sushi roll. i think its just salmon cream cheese and avocado. combined with some wasabi powered low sodium soy sauce.... wow its like a cracker jack surprise for your taste buds.

oh okay so really funny [slightly embarrassing for me] thing happen today. im hanging out at the post office down the street mailing something to mom. which by the way i hate going to the real post office. it seems like every time i do something wrong they point it out. when i first started going i didnt know anything about mailing anything and they would always send me away with something to fix. this one lady.... ugh, i wont go there. lets just say that today someone took a package completely unwrapped to her and she fixed it up for her.. i was ticked. so i get the package sent on its merry little way and i make my way back to my car. or so i thought. i guess i was just hanging out in my own little daydream because i noticed the door wouldnt open and i focused in to realize that.... yeah julie thats so NOT your car. lol.... yes, there were people around. so i tried to slyly slip around to my car. i did laugh at myself though. always make sure you laugh at yourself. outloud, so that people can tell you are laughing at yourself. because then it doesnt quite look like you are so dumb. [ive had experience]

tonight i get to write part [i say part because we are turning in sections at a time, this week its the introduction, for the research study im doing] of a paper. not all my articles have come in through the library though so this should be interesting. or something like that anyway.

oh yes, happy wednesday. [because singles awareness day is overused and we dont mention valentines day in our house. lol] i saw a friend, philip, on my way to class today and i todl him happy wednesday and he just laughed... he said, you know ive heard that a lot today... mainly from people that live in YOUR house. haha, what can i say. we are the girls ministry house with absolutely no hesitation of boy drama. im not entirely sure if this is supposed to be perceived as a good thing or a bad thing. last semseter someone was telling melissa and i a story about pranking someone and he said.. you know the pretty girls house. we were like whaaaat?!! he quickly fumbled for words realizing the impact of what he had just said could possibly mean for his well being. we were like well what is our house then? he was like... ohhhh you guys are the fun girls. you know... uh uh... lol, we knew what he meant. but it was still fun to pick on him. theres always some sort of craziness going on here. who needs boys to entertain you when youve got roomies to have scarf parties with and others that do a convincing job of dressing up as flamingos and yard gnomes and yet another that can make the word wow with her mouth and hands?

cassies got the scarf that swallows you whole.

gillian and diana scared the unsuspecting kids at the reformation party.

im pretty sure thats not what karrie was going for but i prefer it to gangster head banger.

Hold up, wait a minute, put a little love in it

Doctor, Doctor, I've got an emergency
It seems I'm head over heels, a case of L-O-V-E
It's like I'm glowing inside
Yeah, a light I can't hide
And if this feeling is bad then I don't wanna be right
What I've got in my soul gives me the highest delight
Oh yeah it's better than drugs
In fact it's sent from above, huh huh

Hold up, wait a minute, put a little love in it

Hey, Can't kick the habit
Yeah, I got to have it
Yeah, I 'm what they call a
Love addict, Love addict
Hey, can't live without it
Yeah, G'on shout about it
Hey, I'm a symptomatic
Love addict, Love addict

Need a refill cause I just can't get enough
I've got a fever, oh yeah, and the prescription's love
So lay the truth on me
Cause that is all that I need

Hold up, wait a minute, put a little love in it

Hey, Can't kick the habit
Yeah, I got to have it
Yeah, I 'm what they call a
Love addict, Love addict
Hey, can't live without it
Yeah, G'on shout about it
Hey, I'm a symptomatic
Love addict, Love addict

I'm blessed, I must confess
My heart is pounding in my chest
Cause this love's the best
I'm just a love addict

Coming down with something outrageous
Lookout now cause it so contagious
This feeling's got me reeling
So amped up that I hit the ceiling
Gotta clear my throat
Huh huh, now I gotta have some more

Hold up, wait a minute, put a little love in it
[Family Force 5: Love Addict]

she does the watermelon crawl.

not. well, maybe just not in public.

it was gorgeous weather here today!!! and... the poor trees.. they are confused, and in bloom!

yesterday was a good day for church. well, besides the appropriate fact that it was sunday.... i took myself back to north andereson, which is the church i visited frequently last semester but hadnt made it to yet this time around. i am so glad i did. much to my mothers dismay i am a bit of a floater as far as churches go, i havent settled down. although... i do see her point about finding a church, i just havent... in my three years, yet. anyway, im glad i went to north anderson yesterday. and it just happen to be their wmu project week. or some such like that. they had a ladies luncheon right after church and as i was making my way toward slipping out the door after the sermon i ran into the pastor. after getting into a conversation with him he invited me to the luncheon, so i couldnt decline. [which, im glad i didnt]]. i found a seat during the service next to this very sweet elderly lady. she ended up being one of the oldest in the church and had been gone for a while due to knee issues. so everyone was swinging by to visit her. i kind of felt like a long lost distant great niece, as no one else was sitting on the pew with us. anway, the sweetest lady to sit next to when you go to church alone award definately goes to Ms Inez.

I have come to worship the Lord of Lords
In this place it's Your face I will adore
Everyday God I need You more and more
So I am here to seek You out Lord
I have come to praise the King of Kings
Lift up my hands and shout and sing
I can't express all the power that it brings
When I lift my life up to the King
If it's Your will, I'll live till I'm 99
If it's Your will, You can take my life tonight
Until then I'll praise You (2x)
[Disciple: 99]

shes thrilled for salads that are chick pea happy.

i have developed a serious love for chick peas. im practically convinced that they were a small gift from God. they are trying to sneak their way into my lfe on a very regular basis. no better way than when combined with feta and leafy greens.... yum.
it definately started hailing here today, its probably over with by now, but when i went outside earlier sure enough it was. very tiny and turned to water practically instantly, but it was there. im having a hard time adjusting to this weather the past couple of weeks. i mean, last week classes were cancelled for sleet, just yesterday it was t shirt and sandal weather (so you know i jumped at the opportunity to wear sandals) and now its cold again. craziness, plain and simple.

i found out though that the weather sure doesnt effect my ability to get out of bed in the mornings for class. i was doing sooo well about getting up decently early, and then it got cold and i started slipping. i would wake up and be shivering if not at least from the knees down from the window at the foot of my bed, cocoon myself in covers and make it extremely difficult for me to coax myself into the cold. at least thats what i was blaming my late sleeping on. until the sun decided to show back up and im still struggling. actually, i just dont even wake up now. i made a solid decision last night to fix the problem because not getting up early enough to shower when i was a freshman didnt bother me as much as it does now. it makes it too easy to rationalize going back to bed after class. not to mention you feel crummy and dont want anyone to look at you for the entire hour, or hr 15 min take your pick. plus i read an article somewhere[... dont ask where, b/c it may have been while i was waiting in line to pay for my groceries and i wont admit it to your face] that the idea that showering makes you feel better in the mornings isnt just in your head. apparently the hot water releases feel good endorphins. so what time did the pep talk with myself inspire me to get up this morning you might ask?.... i think theres a competition im running with myself and i broke it this morning... exactly twelve minutes before class mi amigo.

BUT i did manage to get myself to the recylcing center today. for which my car is probably thanking me. i loaded my car sometime early/mid week and the center decided to close early that day [or i just dont know what time they close and am choosing to blame them instead] so two boxes full of random jugs/bottles/boxes have been just hanging out in my back seat. i LOVE going there, i get to play this game with myself where i imagine all the clutter stressing up my life in those boxes too, right before i chuck them in the bins. its quite satisfying. plus you get to feel like you are accomplishing something. a little something, but hey they add up. so, no matter how many bumper stickers karrie wants to buy me trying to tell me that i am a treehugger, [haha..] i will still admit i love it. even if there is some sort of self serving purpose involved.

speaking of Karrie, its funny how sometimes we just need a friend to point out the obvious to us. i was rambling to her some frustration that was bothering me the other night and as our conversation was about to end she mentioned, you know why dont you just have some God time and read your Bible. i bet your homework will even go easier afterward. that was like a duh moment for me. but im so glad she brought it to my attention because i decided to randomly read the first book of Peter. [its only five chapters, dont get impressed] what stood out to me?
[5:6-11] "Therefor humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. Be of soper spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world. After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To Him be dominion forever and ever, Amen."
i think all too often i get too caught up in stressful situations that seem to be piling hirer and hirer, and i forget that someone else has already been there and done that. that God cares. that the devil is intentionally trying to make you fall. and that you just gotta buckle up and push through it, because its not going past God unseen, and you just gotta ask for help. i dont see why i keep convincing myself that i would rather worry over something than just pray about it. its pretty simple, but i bet in a few hours when its practically rush hour at work i will find myself in need of reminding yet again.

And today I'll trust you with the confidence
of a man who's never known defeat
But tomorrow, upon hearing what I did
I will stare at you in disbelief
Oh inconsistent me, crying out for consistency

And you said "I know that this will hurt
but if I don't break your heart, then things will just get worse.
If the burden seems too much to bear,
remember, the end will justify the pain it took to get us there."

And I'll let it be known (at times I have shown)
Signs of all my weakness
But somewhere in me, there is strength

And you promised me (that you believe)
in time I will defeat this
'Cause somewhere in me, there is strength

And today I'll trust you with the confidence
of a man who's never known defeat
And I'll try my best to just forget
that that man isn't me

And you said "I know that this will hurt
but if I don't break your heart, then things will just get worse.
If the burden seems too much to bear,
remember, the end will justify the pain it took to get us there."

And you said "I know that this will hurt (I know this will hurt)
but if I don't break your heart, then things will just get worse. (things will get much worse)
When the burden seems too much to bear, (seems too much to bear)
remember, the end will justify the pain it took to get us there."

Reach out to me
Make my heart brand new
Every beat will be for you, for you

And I know you know
You touched my life
When you touched my heavy heart
and made it light
[relient k: let it all out]

she wonders why shes so tired.

then memory tells her that she got up at eight this morning.

where did the weekend go! i was going to meet the girls tonight at denny's after they left the formal... but im tooo tired. once i sat down i was done for.

man.. dont go to the supermarket hungry. even more so... dont go on superbowl sunday eve. especially at eleven in a county where blue laws go into effect at midnight making it impossible to buy anything but essential food items for twelve hours. its a disaster, trust me. lines out the wazoo. item of choice: your favorite [or in most cases cheapest] non liquor alcoholic beverage. but.... i did get my half and half. and some broccoli. lol, ive had a thing for broccoli lately. steamed, in thai stirfry, steamed. im buying it as much [or more often] as families of four buy bread. whatever vitamin that is found primarily in green veggies....[for lack of my memory] .... i got it in abundance.
hmm. i think i will finish off the night by filling out valentine cards. i think i find some kind of happiness in sending random loved ones valentine cards. perhaps because i think its when they least expect it [although they wont in a few years when they are expecting one from me on that day because i have conditioned them so ...ohhhh psych termonology. haha] anyway, there is this lovely little thrifty card shop down the street. theyve got, im fairly certain decently out of date but college student budget kind of cheap, cards for every occasion for every emotion having person in the world. its a nice little place, the ladies in there never recognize me when i come in but they seem to have a lot of regulars. i guess im not regular enough. they are so sweet, will help you with anything, and always make sure that your envelope fits the card; for those dummies such as myself whom just pick up the card without that kind of attention to detail.

someday we will meet beyond the stars
and it'll be away from here
someday we'll meet beyond the time and the bars
and it will be away from here
[rilo kiley, august]

shes finding shes in love....

with work breaks at Panera. haha.

in the middle of working a double shift on a saturday, and listening to servers complain all day long, ive come to determine that the best way to spend that hour and a half break is none other than to sit in a comfy corner booth, chow down on a half bowl of broccoli cheddar soup, half portabella and mozzarella panini, sip half and half filled free refill dark roast coffee, and wander the internet. all of which can be accomplished sitting right where i am this moment: panera. i never realized how awsome this place that karrie has been talking about forever until just recently.

a few of the girls came in to see me at work today. it made my morning happier. bailey, melissa, diana, sophie, and rachel. i love those girls. its going to be sad to have to live without them when the time comes. i dont know whats going to happen next semester. rachel and i have been talking about renting an apartment, which i would really LOVE to do. but... ijust dont know yet if it will be worth it or if it will be too much of a struggle.

the past few days i have had oregon on my mind. well, ive had the year after i graduate anderson on my mind to better put it. i dont know what it is im going to do for sure. i say i dont want to live in west virginia but it would be nice to be close to grandma for a while. then again now that ive gotten used to living close to all resources its possible i would go insane for driving everywhere. i say i want to go to oregon. which i do, i really do want to. from what i know so far. i do want to go to graduate school for occupational therapy and i do want to travel. the only question remains is whether or not this is the right time. its hard to predict that. i dont want to skip out on the opportunity then learn that i loose it becuase i get tied down somewhere else. i keep entertaining the idea of joining the peace corps or some such like that for a year between anderson and grad school. but i dont knwo how realistic of me that is. there is no doubt that i have the desire. i just dont know what i would do or how to get there. i guess its a bit of a self confidence issue. im trying to keep my ears open to God, but i think right now we are at a draw. im at a fork in the road and ive got no clue which way im supposed to go. i guess it is a little bit in the future, but graduation will be here before i know it/ or ready for it im sure.

backpacking across europe. that would literally be amazing. im not even going to lie. not solo though. definately not solo.

build your own television receiver
staying home can't be that bad for me
cause i'm not scared
but i'd like some extra spare time
easily earn me big money

i'm a modern girl but i fold in half so easily
when i put myself in the picture of success
i could learn world trade
or try to map the ocean


i've had it with you
and mexico can f*ing wait
and all of those french films about trains
cause i'm not scared
but i'd like some extra spare time
i'm not scared
but the bills keep changing colors

they say california is a recipe for a black hole
and i say i've got my best shoes on
i'm ready to go (ready to go)

[Rilo Kiley:Pictures of Success]

she wakes up to 'snow'

of course last night the news was that classes would be cancelled today because the weather was supposed to get nasty. i expected no such luck to happen. i dont remember [which i could be very wrong] a time while ive been here that classes have been cancelled. but alas at six oclock this morning i woke to:

so i fell back into bed. but then i thought, i better make sure or i will regret this. so i pulled myself off my loft to check and sure enough classes were cancelled. so i just assumed leadership would be too. so of course i took my on the very edge of consciousness self back to sleep. surprisingly i woke up around nine thirty and actually made it out of bed. well... the doorbell was ringing incessantly... i found out later that sophie had been locked outisde with her innocently excited and snowball clad hands. so, of course she rang the doorbell off the hook. which was kind of funny. probably not so much for the girls still in bed, but still.

i took myself outside. to find out that this is what cancels class in south carolina. [but hey im not complaining]


see, its definately not the snow man makin kind. more like, get on your nerves, and make the roads treacherous later on at night kind. but i still love our fire escape:


and i dont think anyone of us has ever even used this door or steps before:
so the house had breakfast together. thats always fun. the energy from knowing we dont have classes... mixed with caffeine in coffee.... and electronic harry potter puppet shows... and bailey trying to either insult my eggs or knock my head off with a broom handle.... priceless.


gillian's laptop wishes it were a mac and rachel claims she is from europe. lol.

and thats it for pictures of the morning of our snow day experience. yeah for julie figuring out on her own how to add photos to blogs!!! [not mentioning how easy it is]


I keep playing your part
But it’s not my scene
Want this plot to twist
I’ve had enough mystery
You keep building it up
But then you’re shooting me down
But I’m already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting, waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting, waiting
[Jack Johnson]